for a short moment last night
while watching a movie
i felt the emotion
commonly called “finding god”.
then i lost it.
it all happened in my head
and it was interesting.

please
do not underestimate
how difficult it is
to write
these shitty poems.

each of them needed
a unique moment of
desperate agency.

as i said before
my goal is to write
a perfect poem which saves all people.

to achieve this
i must practice writing every day
and focus on the most abstract level
of the human experience.

most importantly
i must find the perfect moment
to write this poem
which is the last moment of my life
when i am still fit to write.

the biggest challenge is
to know when is
my last poetry writing moment
and capture it.

for a short moment
i had a daydream
how i will take weeks
to write a perfect poem
with lots of hidden meaning
and perfect rhythm and rhyme
but i quickly woke up and remembered
how i am too stupid and lazy for that

at the same time
i feel great nostalgia
for the stone age
and the far future
and i try to connect it
to the very moment i am in

california desert fire with irena, steven, sara
fluorescent algae in south africa with ivan
tim joking in a race in south africa
waking up next to marko
ivan joking about math in sweden
making a sandwich in australia
snowboarding over a deep untouched snow in serbia
diving deep in thassos
setting a tetris record in thassos
swimming in the dark in a fjord in a race in norway
running out of gas with rafael in italy
snowboarding with sofija in serbia
swimming with marko on my back in france
arguing on stage in vicenza
downhill mountain biking in belgrade

i waited months
to write this poem
about a perfect moment
i had in a supermarket.

after this moment
all moments will be
compared to it.

the last conversation
the conversation before that
and the conversation before that

this morning
while i was taking a shower
i noticed how water drops were falling
on the plastic shower cabin floor

the drops glittered
in the most beautiful way i have ever seen
but i only noticed it
for a millisecond in the corner of my eye

i tried to replicate
the angle and speed of the drops
but i was not able to see the glitter again
the moment was lost

but i am so happy
to have experienced
this moment of rare beauty
while taking a shower this morning

meeting new people all the time
not remembering your fuckups
believing you are charming
learning not to give a fuck
enjoying the moment
eating mcdonalds more often
looking positively towards future