life


i am 44 years old

i am at the age when
i can say that
i am at the half of my life
but i am closer to the age
when i have to stop
saying that
unless i am in lotr.




page 501

most of my poems
are written in a timeline
i have been writing
for the past 23 years.
it is a documentation
of one aspect of
half of my life.
this poem is written
on page 501.




hollywood

the scariest thing
about hollywood is
that it has
programmed me
to be something
which is not me
and therefore i have
never existed
and my entire life
was lost




kanye west death

i hope
kanye west dies before me
because
his music is
the most perfect representation
of how a person changes through life
and i want to see the whole thing




aliens

it is most likely
that no alien civilization
will be as stupid as we were
to bother with building
such useless technology
as spaceships.

most likely they will
figure out how to live
a long and happy life
in the environment
they grew up in.




life lesson number one

let me try put this life lesson
into a semi decent poem:
the main thing about
the things you have
is that they cost more
to keep then to get.
and i am not talking about
houses and money and that stuff.
hope that makes
some sense to someone.




julian assange

he gave his life
so we can pretend
that our fantasies
are better than
the reality
which is
a fancy way
to say
he is as useful
as crossfit




this bug is my hero

i found a bug in the hallway
and threw it in the toilet.
an hour later i went to pee
and the bug was still there swimming.
i felt sorry for it
but i really needed to pee
so i peed on it and flushed.
i felt bad about doing it but i did it.
the bug did not get flushed
and kept swimming.
i was very happy.
i made a little stick out of toilet paper
and took it out
and released it outside.
i hope it had a great life
with a great family and an awesome career
and lots of kids and grand kids.
this bug is my hero.




three key life moments

the last conversation
the conversation before that
and the conversation before that




amazing beauty

i experienced a moment
of unbelievable beauty
for only a nanosecond.
i was fat and in my bed,
the room was dark
and i moved the playstation controller
up and down
and it casted a shadow
on the wall
which i saw in the mirror.
some people never experience
such beauty
in their entire life.




siu vásquez

she is a post-it note
saying:
ideology is not a chit chat
but life and death stuff.




turning 40

living so long is boring.
I think we were not meant
to live so long.
I can not remember
most of my life anyway
because it is so long.
the only thing that makes sense
is to be with the kids.
now i just have to
invent some stuff to do
to fill few more years.
I miss war.




business plan

if someone
had shown me
a business plan
for a human life
i would have never invested
in my own life
and would skip
my own birth.




life is not what i expected

all i wanted from life
was to sleep most of the day
eat ton of cakes and not get fat

and then comes all this stuff
with people getting sick
dieing and fighting




essence of advertising

i want emotion
i want life
i want to change everything
i want to be the chosen one
i want to succeed
i want to be loved
i want to love
i want to become
a nuclear weapon of love
i want to live forever
i will live forever
i will never die
and everybody will love me
every second of my neverending life
will be an extreme explosion
of wonderful emotions
time is nothing
love it everything
because i am buying
this toothbrush




advice to rafael

you are a
very smart
very hardworking
very talented
very dutch boy

this book shows
that very early
you have discovered
a working system

is it worth
dedicating
your life
to this
or any system

or should you go
where no dutch boy
has gone before




i am so smart

i am so smart
i could just explode

i am so smart
i should never die
and if i ever die
every second of my life
should be studied by
million scientists

i am so smart
that i can only
talk to
dolphins and aliens

i am so smart
so gods envy me

i am so smart
if you smell my fart
you can learn
all the secrets
of the universe




thank you mr. death

thanks
for letting me live
so long
im already 30
that is already
way too much
a bit more would
be ok
but i am not
pressuring
whatever you decide
is cool with me




at any point in my life

i would not like
to have my penis cut off
by a cigar cutter
to fall face down and
break my teeth on a rock
to insult someone so much
that they never speak to me again
to have lumbal punction
or to burry my children
while dying of
a very painful cancer
while my wife is cheating
on me with my best friend
who owes me money




life

i am 28 years old and
that is already more than enough
i guess its important not to
worry yourself about it too much