1031 internet story 1: elon and massimo

elon is very rich
and he likes massimo.
when massimo was sick
and needed money to get well
elon did not give him money
but he made a subscription feature
so massimo can make his own money.

elon, please take me to mars

scientists say
that mars is very hostile for us
but i think compared to earth
mars is like getting a blowjob

i never cared to move to mars
but if someone can guarantee to me
that there will be no mass media
i will sign up instantly

i will live i a cave,
grow potatoes in my shit,
drink someone else’s urine,
die young from radiation poisoning,
as long as i never see the news again